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How to Not to be a Bridezilla

How to Not to be a Bridezilla

The majority of women who get engaged and begin planning their weddings do not intend to turn into the dreaded bridezilla. However, we have all heard stories of how crazy some women become when it comes to planning their weddings and how hard to deal with they are. Make sure that you do not turn into the crazy bride-to-be that everyone avoids like the plague. Here are a few tips to remember as your wedding day draws near.

  • Listen and respect the opinions of others. While your wedding day is the one day you have most likely been dreaming of for years, this doesn’t give you the right to ignore the thoughts and opinions of others involved in the wedding. Yes, you and your fiance will have the final say when it comes to the decisions that need to be made, but make sure that you take the time to listen to the input of others before you make your decision. And, when you do make a decision that isn’t in-line with what someone else thinks, be respectful when explaining why you chose to do things the way you did.
  • The last word doesn’t always have to be yours. I’m not quite sure why so many people feel like they always have to have the last word these days. Even in heated discussions, the discussion can easily be diffused by saying, I think we are going to have to agree to disagree. If you find yourself in a discussion about weddings (or even your wedding), remind yourself that you don’t have to have the last word. You don’t want everyone around you to think that you are trying to be a know-it-all or that you believe your opinion is superior to everyone else’s. Therefore, make a point to refrain from always giving your opinion on every topic involving weddings.
  • Don’t set ridiculous expectations for your wedding. Too many brides-to-be walk around expecting perfection from everyone involved in their wedding. Don’t do this and furthermore, don’t expect to have a perfect wedding day. I honestly believe that perfect weddings don’t exist. Even if your decor and the ceremony have been planned to the last detail, there will be something happen at the last minute that may require you to improvise. And, even if the issue appears to be a major deal to you, if you handle it with grace and don’t let it ruin your day, then most likely your guests won’t even know there was an unplanned problem and your day will appear to have been perfect to them. When you go expect ridiculous expectations for your wedding and the people involved in it, you will most likely create tension and stress for yourself and everyone else that doesn’t need to be there.
  • Be flexible. Again, I know that the upcoming wedding is your wedding but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t remain flexible. Many women get ideas for their weddings stuck in their heads before they actually check to see whether or not they have the budget for these ideas. For example, let’s say you have always envisioned your wedding to take place in an award-winning park. However, either the park is booked for your wedding date or you can’t afford it. Don’t let this ruin the entire day and don’t treat it like a major tragedy. Be willing to be flexible. Either change your wedding date or book a more affordable, yet equally beautiful, venue. Apply this flexibility to all areas when planning your wedding. Don’t get caught up in the small details. At the end of the day, all that matters is that you will have married your soul mate, right?
  • Don’t talk non-stop about the wedding. Everyone knows that you are planning your wedding and that it is the top priority on your mind right now, but that doesn’t mean that they want to talk about it non-stop. Your family and friends have lives of their own, remember? Therefore, let them talk about them every now and then and refrain from bringing the subject back to you and your wedding plans. Nobody wants to be around someone who is self-absorbed and doesn’t care about anyone except themselves.
  • Remember, this isn’t just your wedding. There are two of you getting married, remember? While your fiance may not have quite as many opinions as you do about the details for the big day, chances are that he does have one or two wishes that he wants for his wedding day. Just remember that you aren’t the only one who is looking forward to this wedding. You do have a fiance who will be sharing the day, and its memories, with you. Therefore, give him the ability to add a few of his own personal touches to the wedding.

There is a lot of pressure that comes with planning a wedding and, if you aren’t careful, the pressure can easily get to you and before you know it, you will be a bridezilla. Hopefully, the tips above will help draw you back in as the pressure and stress begins to mount. Just remember, the main thing is that you will be married to your best friend when the (wedding) day is done, all the other little details don’t come close to that one major detail. Therefore, treat all of those issues like the ‘little’ issues that they are and enjoy your day!!

Dealing with Family at Weddings

Dealing with Family at Weddings

This past weekend I was the matron of honor in my best friend’s wedding. The wedding itself was wonderful, but all of the drama leading up to the wedding (and even a little afterwards) was a bit crazy. Yes, every wedding has drama, but this was just a little ridiculous. The behavior of the groom’s father and his family left my friend (the bride) incredibly stressed out by the time Friday’s rehearsal dinner rolled around.

If you are planning a wedding and have some opinionated family members involved, the tips below should help you out.

  • Get on the same page with your future spouse. Generally, potential problems between you and family (or soon-to-be-family) will begin show early in the planning stage. Don’t hesitate to tell your fiancé what is going on. After all, you are marrying your best friend, right? It’s important that you both get on the same page about the situation as soon as possible so you can both present a united front to your family regarding the decisions you’re making about the wedding. Why a united front? More than likely, these family members will try to speak with each of you separately because they think it will give them a better opportunity to win you over to their way of thinking.
  • Don’t tell them everything. One of the problems that contributed to my friend’s wedding was how much information the groom’s family was given. It wasn’t because the bride and groom were just offering up information willingly, they were put on the spot several times and asked specific questions that, frankly, didn’t have any business being asked. To prevent this from happening, set up a game plan from the very beginning with your fiancé and determine how you will respond to questions about the wedding that you don’t want to answer. Just because you are planning a wedding, doesn’t mean everyone needs to know how you’re doing everything or when everything is occurring.
  • Stand firm in your decisions. Finally, don’t be afraid to stand firm in the decisions that you and your fiancé make regarding your wedding. This is YOUR day. Your parents, grandparents and other family members have all had the chance to plan their own wedding – they don’t need to plan yours. And, for those of you with younger family member who are trying to interfere, they will have a chance to plan their own wedding – so don’t feel obligated to please them with your wedding. That’s the biggest issue many people face when planning weddings…trying to please everyone. The only two people who need to be happy with the wedding plans are the bride and groom. Therefore, stand firm in your decisions.